Multiple Milongasms

"Tanguera Worship" by Rigoberto [for AlexTangoFuego]

"The state of being so completely immersed in the music [milonga] and so profoundly [metaphysically] connected with your partner that movement flows from within the partnership absent conscious thought." [Dan Boccia of TangoTrance, Alaska]

It happened last night, with two different followers, two tandas, eight songs. Yes, our divine teacher/organizer and newly married DJ was playing four-sies for milonga tandas. I think. I was absent conscious thought, dancing milonga with my eyes [mostly] closed.

I had never given this possibility a second thought. Nor a first thought. The possibility of a "tangasm" or tango trance whilst dancing milonga has never occured to me. Interesting. One of the followers is a woman I haven't danced with much over the past year. At all. We danced once or twice a few years ago. She's always been in high demand, and I've just never asked/cabaceo'd. I'm bad about that. Too much thinking and not enough dancing. That's going to change. Wow.

Perhaps most amazing, these multiple milongasms happened with my sugarpiehoneybunch watching.

Hmmm.

Anyone else ever have this happen?

Everybody knows this, right?

here i am
Originally uploaded by leone.

I was talking to a friend the other day and she was telling me about a guy who is teaching now with his partner. I used to call him "Rico Suave", but that was before I knew him. He's actually a really nice guy - a kid really.

My friend had danced with him at a milonga and was talking about the lack of connection with him. She attributed it to the fact that his dancing is all about him. His steps, his sequences, his embellishments, the way he looks. She can feel that he is focused on himself and his dancing and not her. He's dancing with himself.

It struck me after our conversation that everyone (leaders - especially beginners) might not know this - that this will screw with your tango - it's the me/ego mindset.

Tango is all about the woman. It's about making her feel good and safe and making her feel beautiful and special in those nine minutes on the floor. Leaders have to focus on the "her" and the "now". Her. Now. This moment. This connection. This dance. This tanda.

Focus your thoughts and energy on her. Think about her feet, not yours. Think about what you want her feet to do. Beginners have the disadvantage of having to think about steps and sequences and weight transfers and the minutiae. Being able to think about her will come, in time. Try it some time though, even if just for a minute of one song. Focus your thoughts and energy on her. See how it feels.

For me, when I realized this a couple of years ago, and when I was able to manifest this all the time in my dance, it was a breakthrough. A defining moment. An epiphany.

Sometimes we forget about the basic, underlying principles, and just have to be reminded.